


Ephemeris

by WorriedPretzel



Category: Final Fantasy XV
Genre: Angst, At this point in the story anyway, Body Horror, Canon-Typical Violence, Dreams and Nightmares, Gen, Hallucinations, Headaches & Migraines, Long-Term Relationship(s), M/M, Mind Games, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, The Mindscape
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-01-28
Updated: 2017-02-06
Packaged: 2018-09-20 12:25:36
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 2
Words: 9,439
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9490910
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WorriedPretzel/pseuds/WorriedPretzel
Summary: Do you ever wonder if what you see is truly there? Most don't. Cor definitely doesn't, at first.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [thetealord](https://archiveofourown.org/users/thetealord/gifts), [jonphaedrus](https://archiveofourown.org/users/jonphaedrus/gifts).

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It took him better part of an hour to realize that something was off. Daemons, of all things, seemed off. Usually they were scattered around the road every now and then, chasing him down, but now, they seemed…well, the best way to put it was uninterested. They looked after the sound of his motorcycle, screeched at the light and that was it.

One thing he liked about hunting alone was that he had nothing to hide. No more looking around to make sure no one noticed, no one to ask such a silly questions as _‘Are you okay?’_

He was many, many things in his life, but okay was probably not one of frequent ones, especially not lately. Also, most of the time, people didn’t really care for the answer.

And so now, Cor Leonis sat down on his motorcycle, head in his hands as he waited for the worst part of the migraine to hopefully stop soon, so he could once again delve into the endless night on yet another daemon hunt.

He sat there for a long while, longer than he would like, in the subtle shine of runes on the ground. He opened his eyes slowly; the runes were hardly even there anymore, whatever magic left in them failing. It was not long now and they _will_ fail completely.

Well. He should probably stick to somehow safer options every now and then. Lestallum was so close now, he was almost back. Maybe he won’t hunt today after all.

Even though he enjoyed being alone sometimes, by now he was quite eager to meet with more people. So much time alone was getting to him. And for what? That outpost got overrun just as he said it would. It was too far away from any other, and too small with only few hunters frequenting it nowadays.

It didn’t matter. The outpost was gone, and he almost didn’t get out. Later, he was happy that he went in place of Iris for this hunt; as strong and eager as she was, it would not have helped her there. He himself got out by sheer power of luck.

He shook his head slowly, checking how much worse his migraine would get with motion. He was too tired and after that last fight, out of about every healing option he had, trying to heal where a daemon tore into his back. He was also on his last change of mostly good clothes. It was then he decided no more hunts along the way, just straight back home.

He took one last long breath. It actually felt like the more time he spent here in light of the runes, idly sitting on his bike and doing nothing, the worse his migraine got. So, the best thing he could do was simply give up, get back on the road and go. And so he did.

It took him better part of an hour to realize that something was off. Daemons, of all things, seemed off. Usually they were scattered around the road every now and then, chasing him down, but now, they seemed…well, the best way to put it was _uninterested_. They looked after the sound of his motorcycle, screeched at the light and that was it. He actually slowed down just to be sure, and after a moment oh, oh he was sure.

It was rather unsettling and it made him go faster than before, wind hopefully chasing daemon sounds away from his ears.

***

He got to Lestallum in under an hour and he had no idea how that happened. Perhaps he was too lost in thought, perhaps he drove more recklessly than he thought. Or perhaps he just looked at time and his surroundings wrong. He was never sure what time of day it was anymore.

In Lestallum, it was apparently almost evening.

Cor made his way to the hunters’ headquarters and told the story of another lost outpost in details he had not spoken of on the phone. Poor thing died on him a day or two ago anyway and reception was not the best. After that, Iris found him and more or less dragged him to dinner with others. It was one of these nice evenings, when everyone accidentally gathered without actually meaning to. Even Cid was there, freshly moved to Lestallum. Cindy was nowhere to be seen though, he supposedly missed her by a couple of minutes.

Laughs and Ignis’ food and chatter dulled the pain in his head for a moment, but it got even worse after a while and he mumbled an apology, told them he was tired, or at least he thought he did tell them. He wasn’t too sure. Iris looked worried, even Monica seemed to give him a look, but they let him go. Again, he wasn’t sure. Maybe they talked to him and he just left. All he knew is that he stumbled into his room as the world twisted around him and he passed out.

***

Cor woke up when someone shook him, enough to make his teeth clank. Without a thought he retaliated, pushing the person off of him, to the ground, with one hand around their throat, while other hand searched for his blade.

For a moment, he saw a head full of maroon curls and lips twisted into challenging smile, purring sweetly his name and Cor _grinned_ as he squeezed his fingers around Ardyn’s throat–

And then he blinked and the image was gone, instead person on ground was none other than Monica, gasping for air, eyes full of fear, desperately trying to kick him off of her.

He froze and eased the grip, then immediately let go and she scrambled away from him.

“I am so sorry,” he got out, voice raw, he knew not from what, let go of the blade he managed to find a moment prior. Then he sat back and sighed, rubbing both hands on his temples. His head was killing him right now. Sleep didn’t really help then.

To her credit, it took Monica only a little while to collect herself back to her usual professional demeanor. She coughed a bit and Cor felt a pang of guilt run through him. But when she looked up there was a smile on her face.

Apparently Cor was _screaming_ in his sleep, _on the floor_ , where he fell last evening. All he remembered was getting to a room, not even closing the doors. He did close them, as Monica had to open them to be sure what was going on inside, but didn’t get much farther than that before collapsing.

“Are you truly alright?” she asked after a bit of talking, voice almost a whisper as she heard commotion in the corridor outside his room. Cor was thankful for that, but still a sigh escaped his lips. Cor’s definition of alright was a bit different from others. Then again, Monica knew about his migraines, long before all of this. She would not ask out of nowhere.

He must really look like shit.

“Not really,” he told, truthful. This _was_ somehow worse than usual. The usual was just that – just pain. It never actually got to him passing out before, not just from that. And again, Monica knew this. She shot him a worried look, this one gentler than before.

“You should rest a bit in here. You have been on road for a while now. A bit of undisturbed rest, on an actual bed, not a floor” she added with humor in her voice, though barely noticeable, “will get you back on your feet. When was the last time you had a good night’s sleep?”

Cor thought about answering for a moment, but didn’t really feel like lying. But he didn’t feel particularly willing to go back to sleep after she told him she shook him out of some nightmare either. Not that tempting.

Monica took his silence as an answer of her own and eventually left, with Cor laid down on his bed, staring at the ceiling, wasting time.

After a good while, during which Monica came back once more, very quietly only making sure he was alright this time, Cor sat up, looking down at his hands. Well, more at one hand in particular, the one that he strangled Monica with. He was surprised she didn’t expect any sort of explanation on that, on him grinning like a madman at her while doing so at least. He had no answer ready for that.

Maybe she just thought he was still asleep. Actually, Cor didn’t want to know what she thought of him after that. He would have much more preferred not being fooled with by his still- sleeping brain, to make apparitions of Ardyn out of people that clearly were not him. Still, Cor supposed he should be thankful that the illusion only lasted for a second and he did not attempt to kiss Monica _while strangling her_. That was…well. Reserved only for a certain King.

His lips twisted into a smile at that. Maybe he should go back to sleep for a little while after all.

***

Cor stayed in Lestallum only for a day, resupplied, and got back to the road, on yet another one of almost endless list of daemon hunts that flooded hunter’s headquarters each day.

This time though he met with more hunters, in hopes to take down bunch of daemons that had been drawing closer and closer to another outpost. It was always the same. No more survivors to save, just to keep what they had left and wait for Noc –

“Look out!”

Cor almost got smashed to the ground by giant flaming sword. He managed to roll out of its way at the last moment. Two other hunters took the distraction Cor gave them and dove in on the daemon, quickly finishing it off.

The daemon dissolved into black mist and disappeared into the night a few moments later and one of the hunters went to Cor, reaching their hand to him to drag him back to his feet. He took it, got back up and dusted off his jacked, while trying to figure out what went wrong. He could swear there was no giant when he turned around just a moment before.

***

Cor was losing time.

It was more and more obvious every time it happened, which was, by now, a _lot_. He left hunters he fought with alone after almost getting into a meaningless fight with one of them, just to realize now what was going on. This was certainly new. And quite worrying. He didn’t know how to fight against his head, which had been tormented by his migraine without stop for several days now. He even considered using a small portion of his healing potion, but then scrapped the idea. It would relieve the pain, yes, it always did, but only for a few precious moments not really worth the wasted potion. Things could still be worse.

Soon he realized that, just like about every time before, thinking anything could be worse is the worst thing to do— just as bad as thinking things can’t get any worse. Particularly as he now stopped dead on the road and looked deflated at rather large number of daemons before him.

This would not do. If he attempted to go through, he would more or less be a dead man, Cor the Immortal or not. That was just _too many_.

“Thinking so little of yourself now, Marshal?” a familiar voice whispered into his ear and he jerked to the side, head snapping after the sound so fast he winced in pain afterwards. But there was no one there, anywhere at all as he looked around himself.

“Ardyn?” he tried, but got no answer. This was…not right. Ardyn messed with him differently.

His head must be playing tricks on him again, and picked just the worst time, and the worst person to imitate for it. One that was dangerous both when he was alone, in the open, surrounded by daemons, and when he was around other people who we’re not supposed to know about any of his…involvements with his King.

So, Cor turned his bike around, and drove back, only later realizing that daemons on the road did not attempt to approach him again.

And at last, that gave him a chilling idea.

***

He managed to find an outpost that both of the hunters from previous fight also choose to use, and several more were just readying themselves to head off. Cor paid them no mind other than simple bow of his head as he passed them. Some of them seemed to know exactly who he was and bowed back respectfully, others eyed him warily. It didn’t matter right now. Cor just needed to get into the room he just bought for the night.

As he did, as the door only just shut itself, he practically tore his jacket away, and his shirts, his breath caught as he turned in front of a mirror and looked at his own back. The toned skin and muscle there was changed to dark gray and black, hard and hot to the touch, and he almost didn’t feel it when he dug his own fingers into it while an utter dismay colored  his expression. It was all coming from big scratch across his back that Cor healed with all his potions after the last outpost fell and he was left to spend a night in light of the runes. That was for sure the Starscourge.

***

Cor looked absently at his breakfast. Didn’t really feel like eating anything ever again, let alone whatever the thing before him actually was. He was in his room still, which he didn’t leave at all, despite not sleeping a second, just. Thinking. He wondered why they even brought him breakfast he did not ask for.

He should definitely not let everyone know. Someone, oh yes someone should, but…Iris. Iris should know. Or Monica. Or Gladiolus or Prompto. Maybe even Ignis. One of them would do what must be done, should the need arise.

Maybe he could just go and die at the hands of daemons, hopefully taking a large number of them with him. But people should not know that Cor, _Cor the Immortal_ , out of all people, is going to turn into a daemon. Morale was still a thing after all.

Or perhaps, he should tell Ardyn, drive to Insomnia while he still can. He had not seen him in such a long time. And this illness was spreading quickly after all. If he could choose, he would definitely like to see him last, just –

“Just before you’ll die? Think again, dear Marshal.”

Cor, just like before, spun around, and didn’t really expect to see anything, and yet there he was, sitting on the table on the other side of the tiny room.

Cor opened his mouth and then closed it, a few times actually, before he got one strangled “Ardyn,” out.

The man however looked angry at the sound of his own name and then smiled in a way Cor had never seen before, and it was _dangerous_ and he wanted to back away before he thought better of it. And yet, just as before, as if he could read his mind, Ardyn acted upon it, bouncing of the table and all but tackling Cor against the wall.

“And here I thought just a moment before, you wanted to,” there was a poison in his voice Cor did not know, and anger and something else he could not quite place, before Ardyn kissed him and Cor broke and all but whimpered and reached to tangle a hand in his hair and drag him closer despite the warnings and –

It felt wrong and it left sour taste in his mouth. Just with that thought, the thing before him smiled into the kiss, shifted and disappeared, not into glass shards and magical light, but into a puff of black mist and sparkles like a dying daemon. Laughter, in Ardyn’s voice, but so much not like Ardyn, sounded in his ears, before Cor felt a sharp spike of pain in his chest. He doubled over then, coughing and wheezing and world around him spun wildly as he fell to his knees.

He was coughing up blood that looked almost black at this point, and while this little charade played out, the dark mark on his skin expanded.

The thing, the apparition of sorts, was above him again in just a moment, smiling as it reached down and lifted up his chin, looking down on kneeling Marshal with fondness that was nowhere near the real thing, but still made Cor’s breath catch when he actually managed to look up. 

***

The apparition that took Ardyn’s shape and voice and – and even _smelled_ like him, oh gods – was going to drive him mad. It passed through everything other than Cor himself, no one had seen it and it would not shut up for a second as Cor, wrapped in literally every last piece of cloth he brought with him (and one scarf he held dear but didn’t want to actually wear anywhere visible until now) left the outpost behind him.

Cor could hear the thing’s voice in his head and roar of his motorcycle was useless against it. And then finally when it did shut up, he heard the whispers all around him instead, and as he rode on and on, he saw once more daemons simply looking after him, not even trying to give a chase.

On a whim, he stopped. Stopped and watched as daemons passed him with glances, without any usual animosity. It left him wondering why the giant earlier even bothered to attack him, while pit of his stomach twisted.

Oh, he was afraid. And as if called, the apparition returned, wrapping it’s hands gently around his shoulders and neck, lowering a head of maroon curls onto his shoulder, like so many times before the real Ardyn had. He liked the gesture then. Not now, not from this thing.

“You will do fine,” it said. He wanted to strangle it. Not in the good way. But he did nothing, only chanted in his mind that it, in fact, was not there, only in his head.

He was a fool. Oh, there is something off with the daemons! What was he even thinking back then? His migraines have fooled him long enough and he did not realize that there was something really off with _himself._

He returned to the ride, but didn’t go particularly fast.

“Where do you think you’ll go?” the thing asked again, present only in his head now. This time it didn’t even bother to sound like Ardyn, it was just…wait, no. This voice was definitely one he knew. _Clarus._ And then more joined.

“You have done so much good, and yet you chose to cherish _him_.”

“Are you going to run again, _I_ _mmortal_?”

“Who will you betray _now_?”

“Can you imagine the look on faces of your _friends_ when they find out?”

“Oh, what friends. You have always been alone. You never _mattered_ , not really. You thought you did.”

“ _Poor_ thing.”

“ _Marshal.”_

Cor sped up. Too many voices flew around his head. One of them was Regis and it made his stomach twist more than before and he _saw him_ , by the side of a road, standing, judging as he passed him by. One was a young glaive. Another was Noctis, so, so sad. Then some more.

None of them were there, Cor knew, and yet…more and more added to the last, until it was a cacophony of wailing voices and Cor screamed at them to stop.

“Then stop, why don’t you?” purred Ardyn’s voice next to him and he did not look this time. He also didn’t want to brake at all, and yet his body moved on its own for a moment, and he didn’t even remember when it actually happening, only when he was flying through the air off of his bike and straight for the road.

***

“Yeah, he didn’t look all that well,” Prompto said in thought.

“Maybe it’s his age finally getting to him, you know.”

“He is not that old, come on.”

“Well, he won’t get any younger now, will he.”

“Not you too!”

“Could you please stop bad mouthing him while I’m trying to reach him? Thanks.”

Prompto, Gladio, Ignis and Iris stood right below him, oblivious. They had been talking about dear Cor for a while and he was only somewhat listening, until right now. He went here to look for Cor, but as far as he could tell, the man was not here and people knew not where he went.

Still, Ardyn was curious and considerably bored, and listened on, perched on the roof of the building, unseen unless anyone looked up. No one looked up at the hollow sky anymore. They would not see him.

He idly tried to straighten his scarves but gave up when the conversation below him started anew, as Iris finally by sheer force of will got someone on the other end to pick up phone that have been left behind. Which was worrying somehow. Cor hardly did such things.

Apparently the man all but ran out of the outpost where he forgot the phone, gave no information as to where he was going, and they owner had not cared to look which way he went.

Iris thanked them politely and almost crushed the screen, concern rather clear in her voice while she described the situation to others.

Ardyn, on the other hand, stood up and straightened himself a bit, or, at least what was the possibility for him. This was cheating and no fun, but he did get more worried now and actually didn’t care about his own rules for the moment.

The world around him twisted with magic as he warped so far, far away, to the blade that was left full of his magic in place of Cor’s old sword.

He stumbled a little before he got his balance back, looked around himself and found the owner of the blade sprawled on the ground a few meters away from the sword, and even farther from his motorcycle, with lights still on but laying more or less in a ditch, scratched and silent.

Without a second thought he warped the rest of the way to Cor, sinking to the ground next to him, checking his pulse with hands that were shaking and –

Ardyn stopped when his eyes fell onto Cor’s neck, on mark there, scarf being rather useless to hide it anymore. It was slowly spreading, hot to the touch and full of darkness and regret and whispers ringing in his ears, mark and scourge behind it that was all but killing his Marshal before his very eyes.

He found one of Cor’s potions and used it, healing the worst of his injuries, but it, of course, did nothing for the Starscourge. At least he was not dying from both.

“Cor,” he said, his fingers gently stroking Cor’s cheek. “ _Cor._ ”

And like a magic word, it worked. The man opened those beautiful brilliant eyes, looked at him and his face twisted in utter disappointment.

“Not again. Leave me be.”

Ardyn certainly was not expecting that. “What?” he managed, before slapping him gently as Cor began to doze off again. “Cor, stay with me.”

At that, Cor opened his eyes and looked at Ardyn again. His whole body ached terribly but…well at least he still felt everything.

“You still don’t have enough? I have not much more to give. But I will not turn into one of you,” he said to what he was sure was yet another apparition and called upon his sword. It answered, warping to his open palm with sparks of red magic, fingers closing around the hilt slowly but firm. “Even if –“

“Cor.” There was a hand on his sword and he could not move it any further. It did not pass through the sword like last time he tried to make the apparition go away. It took him a while, but finally, he looked up Ardyn’s face and out of all things, saw understanding in there.

“Daemons have been having way too much fun with your head,” he pointed out, sighing. “Why didn’t you tell me?”

For a while it looked like Cor would not be able to talk at all. Only for a while though.

“How would I? You might consider getting working phone. I was on my way to Insomnia,” Cor said, and tried to get up. Everything hurt. That would heal in time, or just as soon as he could get a hold of one of his potions. Ardyn, however, didn’t let him get up, one hand laid on Cor’s chest, and Cor obediently sunk back to the tarmac without second thought.

“You lost your phone.”

“Well, then I would have used it any other time in last few months I wanted to see you.” There was only a tiny accusation in his voice, but it was there.

That seemed to make Ardyn smile, if for a moment, before he set his eyes back onto the mark. He knew this was bad. He could feel it, pulsating beneath layers of cloth on a large part of Cor’s body. Oddly enough, there was no ooze. But still he could tell. Cor would have not made it to Insomnia.

He sat there for a while, looking at Cor without really looking at Cor, before finally his eyes shifted back to Cor’s— and Cor _knew_.

“ _No_.”

“Why did you try to get to Insomnia then?”

“Not for you to heal me! Just,” he hesitated for a moment.  _To see you one last time_ , he wanted to say, but Ardyn ignored him, took Cor’s head in his hands and hunched down, closer to Cor, almost if to kiss him but their lips met just briefly, before Ardyn put their foreheads together and closed his eyes. Cor realized what was about to happen – oh, he had seen this happen before, alas never with Ardyn – and tried to push him away, but all his strength have left him.

“Ardyn don’t,” he pleaded. “You can’t do this anymore. You _told me._ ”

Ardyn, in fact, did tell him. He told him an awful lot. Not nearly enough, but still. He wondered what would happen to him if he took this daemon from Cor. Alright, that was not true. There was no if, only when. Because his dear Marshal will not die while he is still alive. Certainly not when he can help it. They made a deal after all.

With that thought, with Cor still trying to push him away, blinding warm light enveloped them both and for a moment, endless night around them dissolved.

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Even as Cor walked up to him slowly, nothing changed. As if being conscious of the fact that he did not belong in here changed everything.

Cor opened his eyes abruptly and with a scream, only to shut them again and wince as he rolled onto his stomach. That single look hurt, a light blinded his eyes for a while. Other than that, though, he felt fine. _Somehow_ he was fine, no more whispers and ghostly fingers crawling up his back and –

He realized what it was he had just seen, lifted his head and looked up, at the clear blue sky above him, dumbfounded, and then around himself, at lush and healthy looking grass and trees that now, he realized, were full of birds that chirped at each other an awful lot.

The world was alive again and it left him breathless and in awe and for a moment he completely forgot what had just happened.

After that moment passed though, he looked around himself a bit more. As far as he could tell, he was very much alone. He wasn’t even in the same place but…somewhere. In the middle of the woods. _In daylight._

Several options as to what could have happened presented themselves in his head, as he reached his hand behind himself and touched his back under his shirts, only to find there was no more hard and hot skin that he could barely feel, no more chills and burning in the same place that you noticed only after a while. The mark and all that came with it disappeared, or so he thought. He couldn’t really see it, but as far as he could tell, the mark of the Starscourge in him was gone.

Gone, just as Ardyn was.

He scrambled to his feet at the thought, and looked around himself once more. He could hardly believe what he was seeing. He tried to call for Ardyn, but got no response. It just couldn’t be real. It must be an illusion of some sort. That, or he just slept several days, or months or even _years_ , during which Noctis returned and fought Ardyn and – and oh Gods, he promised to be there for Ardyn when –

He shook his head. This was not it. He did not in fact fall into magical sleep. He was just an ordinary human being, Gods did not care for him. He would have died. And even if somehow he did not die, why was he dumped in the middle of the woods? How would that even happen? Last thing he remembered was begging Ardyn to let him be, somewhere in the middle of the road.

It didn’t really matter for much longer, as he heard a sound that made the birds chirping in the trees fall considerably quieter. A sound of something trying to get through bushes just a short shot away from him.

He had nothing better to do, really, so he followed the noise to its source.

The source was, of course, a big black bird, somehow stuck in said bushes by its reins.

Cor stared at it for a little while, cautious, but it didn’t seem to mind him at all. Which was strange at best.

He heard of the black chocobos, oh, he has seen them but…well. It was probably fair to say they were wild and very untrusting creatures, rather close to the edge of the extinction. Though that was...before. There were hardly any chocobos left now anyway. None he knew of were black.

But still, the fact about the bird remained, and yet this one just didn’t care about him. And had reins and a saddle. _Reins and a saddle_. There were even some bags next to said saddle.

At long last the bird stopped struggling, raised its head and chirped in Cor’s general direction, though Cor could tell those black shiny eyes were not looking at him at all.

It was in that moment he heard the whisper of magic and quiet footsteps behind him. Cor turned around as quickly as possible, but was a little too late and only saw a man, not much older than twenty, pass him by without as much as a glance, soft smile on face that was framed with considerably shorter and way more bouncing maroon curls.

Cor blinked. Then, he blinked again just to be sure, as he watched this younger version of his King walk up to the bird that was chirping at him happily, and with the same soft smile on his face and voice as light as leaves in trees around he scolded the bird , half-heartedly, that running so far when he had sent it away from fight was really not necessary. He was so much different and yet—not at all. He had those innocent, lonely eyes already somehow.

Cor made to step closer. “Ardyn,” he said, voice unbelieving. Somehow he knew that Ardyn before him would probably not hear or see him. He hadn’t before then, when he just passed him by.

Cor wasn’t wrong, of course, and he watched young Ardyn fight with the chocobo’s reins and lose terribly against bushes, while the bird’s chirps grew more and more disappointed with each passing second.

Even as Cor walked up to him slowly, nothing changed. As if being conscious of the fact that he did not belong in here changed everything. He no longer bent grass as he walked, instead moved through it, no longer could he hear his own footsteps on the land below his feet. And when he walked up to Ardyn, as he tried to lay a hand on his shoulder to snap him out of this…memory, or whatever it was, Cor’s hand merely passed through Ardyn. It was almost the same as when the daemon, still only in his head, floated around the world unnoticed and untouched by anyone but Cor, but now even the touch was not possible.

Was _this_ what it was? Was this Ardyn before him another illusion? Another one of these sick ploys, made only to torment him into falling to the scourge? Was Ardyn trying to cure him of the Starscourge even _real_? Maybe all that happened was that he fell off his bike and was still lying there, slowly turning into a daemon without anyone knowing, anyone to stop it one way or another. He wondered for a moment—a long, long moment.

He stopped paying attention to the world around him and when out of nowhere everything stopped and shook and changed, it took Cor by surprise and he cursed under his breath before he was swept with it. He could swear he just heard his own name whispered to him oh-so-close, but it was gone too soon.

The world had reversed itself. Again, he opened his eyes to be met with blue high above him, mirroring in his own eyes. Again he got up and followed the noise, and again the black chocobo before him was struggling with it’s reins. This time he knew what would happen, turned away from the chocobo and saw as Ardyn warped to plain looking dagger, thrown through the trees with unexpected precision, still in flight.

Everything was the same as Ardyn passed him, not looking for a second, and actually walked through the  whole of Cor’s left arm and shoulder this time, while the chocobo lifted it’s head to look at its master.

The chocobo didn’t chirp this time. As a matter of fact, it stayed very, very still, and it was weird enough for even _Ardyn_ to stop and question it in voice that was not far from worried.

Ardyn reached to it, his whole posture emitting calm and yet, the bird plunged at him, right after Ardyn’s raised arm. He managed to step back and questioned the bird with rather obvious hurt in his voice and then. Shut his mouth and looked, quite terrified, as his beloved bird shifted and screeched, short wings turning into giant ones that raised wind and made Ardyn stumble backwards. When he looked back up, there was hardly anything of his bird left, and _it was dark_ instead of sunny day now. The change took place quickly, and the chocobo all but tore its previous form to pieces that were still recognizable here and there. Instead of the chocobo, there was a giant monster with rather prominent fangs sticking in all ways from its broken and torn beak, tall legs and another pair of new, shorter legs that joined wings and made its joints crack terribly on every step it took closer to Ardyn.

It was in the moment the daemon raised new limb with - actually quite nice -  claws to cut at Ardyn that Cor finally got out of his momentary state of panic and commanded his sword to his hand. In one fluid motion he knew all too well, Cor moved before Ardyn and swung his sword at the monster, to intercept its strike.

He wasn’t sure if it would work, but. He was not about to stand idly by, while his King - may or may he not actually be the one - would get torn in half while being too surprised to fight back.

To his never ending surprise, the sword actually met the claws, and not only that, but sliced them off. As the claws flew through the air, they scattered into _glass shards_ , out of all things. Then, the _whole monster_ turned into broken glass as well, fell apart and scattered all around them. Not like royal weapons, no, this was...dirty, dirty and stained glass, but still it was familiar. Too familiar.

Falling shards however were not all, and somehow – even though the angle of Cor’s strike was not right at all for it to happen at all – when the monster vanished, there was still the chocobo underneath, only now with terrible bleeding gash across it’s chest, falling limp to the ground. At this point Ardyn shouted and pushed past him and -

Pushed past him? _That_ took Cor’s mind off the chocobo before him and he quickly grabbed Ardyn’s hand and yanked him backwards from the chocobo. It lasted only a moment, before Ardyn phased away from Cor, this time with his own sword in hands, pointed at Cor.

"You can see me now," Cor breathed out. This didn't make any sense.

" _Of course_ I do. Why did you do this? Why..." and just like that, all the anger in his voice stopped, _he_ stopped, and looked at Cor as if only now he remembered something, as if he just now recognized the person before him. His sword vanished and instead, he turned back to the bird on ground, which was now turning into black mist _and_ glass shards.

Ardyn took a step back - and with that step he turned into Ardyn that Cor knew so well, age and hair and clothes and all - bumping into Cor’s chest and not moving from there. 

"What is this? This...this is not how it happened -"

Cor had only a second to catch Ardyn when the other man staggered, falling down to the ground, clutching his head in hands. Then the world around them crumbled and darkness fell.

 

***

 

Next time Cor opened his eyes, staring into the sky again was not something that surprising, but still a bit unexpected.

He was not in the middle of the woods this time, no, he had his head on bed of wild flowers halfway to the top of a hill, so there was that at least. Still, he was stuck here, in what he thought were either memories – changing, for whatever strange reason - or…or he didn’t really know. Was this afterlife? He didn’t believe in one.

Well, that was not entirely true. He did believe in some sort of afterlife. The one for the Kings at least, one where Ardyn should have been millennia ago, had Gods not been cruel with their task. 

That sort of afterlife, but not—not for Cor. He did not deserve such. Especially not now. After all he knew, he did not believe there was any sort of salvation waiting for those afflicted with the Starscourge.

When this all ended, one way or another people turned into daemons were lost. They would probably just all be killed, not cured. Certainly not getting some sort of afterlife.

So little left. So little to save. It was still enough _to save_ , even one life was enough, but it was...it was so little.

Still, what was the deal with the chocobo, turning into some strange variation of daemon? That just... couldn't be afterlife. It must be a dream of sorts, Cor decided then. Either his, or Ardyn’s. And if Ardyn’s, then those were definitely memories.

Cor shook his head, trying to get back to the moment he was in, and not think any more about afterlife and such. It was then Cor realized even the bothering pain in his head was gone, had been for a while now. Possibly the whole time he was in here. Somehow, he did not realize it at all. He was so used to it now that it felt like something was missing before he figured out what it was.

It was also in that moment he heard a cry. Dream or not, illusion or not, whatever it was, Cor was a good man, and was on his feet soon to find out the source. And he was not alone, no, yet another version of Ardyn joined him very much out of nowhere, carefully leading the chocobo - which was supposed to be _gone_ , Cor realized - by the reins towards the sound.

They climbed, together, up the rest of the hill Cor woke up upon, to see a village on the top, and a small child still wailing in the street, and people simply...didn’t look at the child and continued on with their day.

Cor stopped and furrowed his brows even more than he usually did. It didn’t stop Ardyn, because this one again did not know Cor was there at all, being unreachable when Cor tried.

The villagers were strange at best. They recognized Ardyn, though, as being one of royal blood, and seemed respectful enough and at his request took care of child whose mother has gone missing since this morning. Then again, maybe that made them even stranger. It seemed this was not place frequented by any visitors, let alone this one. They were staring and whispering an awful lot.

Ardyn didn’t seem to mind at all. He was doing the Gods work, after all, it brought him to all the sorts of places, he proclaimed with smile and Cor all but stopped in his track and whatever it was he was doing and listened to him instead, as Ardyn asked about strange creatures emerging at night, phenomena not unheard of, but more and more relevant as of late.

Of course villagers knew, and of course they had problems. Somehow, no one called the creatures _daemons_ yet, but eagerly asked their prince for help.

 _Prince_. Cor’s lips moved but the word just didn’t escape past them. From the way he acted even now, or just from the way he traveled you would never guess. Then again, he had seen Noctis and his friends plenty of times to expect no less.

This memory was agonizingly long and dragged on, but evening was close and with it, Ardyn set for the woods past the village, where villagers said these creatures dwelled.

The forest there was dark even during the day, let alone when night fell. It was then when Ardyn walked like a little lighthouse, with left hand drenched in magical fire, shining brightly enough to both let them see what was around them, and bring attention of pretty much everything in here to them.

Cor quite soon realized they were walking in circles, though it seemed it was more planned than not. There was no point in going deep into the forest if they wanted to help the villagers now.

Cor scratched that thought. No we. _Ardyn_. Just Ardyn. And the chocobo, he supposed. He watched the bird with suspicion after what happened last time, but it seemed to...be normal? Probably. Just usual chocobo antics. Ardyn tried to leave it in safe place in village before they left, but brave bird had none of it. It was nice, really.

All three of them jumped a little when a bush left of them rustled and low growl sounded right of them at the same time.

These creatures were no doubt daemons, three of them in fact, a kind Cor has never seen before, circling their prey for a second longer before pouncing at the same time. Cor was useless like this, as his sword did not strike any of them, just passed through, and none seemed to pay him attention, not even really to the chocobo, instead swarming on Ardyn as their main target.

Cor didn’t really try to be part of the fight after that and simply watched as Ardyn without much difficulty defeated all of them, but didn’t quite kill them yet. When all three of them were almost dead, and could no longer attack properly, Ardyn stepped closer to them and lowered his weapon, though he didn’t dispatch it.

The magic on his left hand vanished, but instead a scarlet glow enveloped the blade in his right, magical energy emitting from Ardyn’s hand, somehow changing the sword slightly, making it a bit longer, a bit more ornamented, a bit more dangerous looking.

No, a lot more dangerous looking, especially as Ardyn raised it and in one swing sent a wave of light against all of the daemons, successfully scattering them into black mist and sparkles and -

Cor blinked when the black mist rising from daemon corpse _caught on fire_. It...probably did not actually caught on fire but it looked like it _so much_. The magic Ardyn used to strike them down was still there and it. Stopped the black mist, the essence of daemon, from spreading and instead turned it into _light_.

This was first time Cor had seen such thing happen and he was flabbergasted, actually reaching for the scattering lights. Flabbergasted enough to not look around himself at all, and he missed another daemon lurking close. He only noticed when Ardyn went after it, with sword still glowing scarlet, leaving path in its wake, and sliced it almost in half. The daemon was weak even though it was rather big and began disappearing in light as well.

This daemon was much livelier than others and it disappeared in bits, not all at once. Just for a moment, it’s shrieks turned into cries, and just for that one single moment, as the body of daemon turned into light, Cor saw, inside thing half vanished, a being that looked faintly human, reaching for them desperately with one hand that it still had and begging for help, before it, too, disappeared into the light and wind carried it away like sparks from bonfire.

At that Cor looked at Ardyn, who seemed outright terrified, as a realization dawned upon him. He dropped his sword to the ground and it shattered, all the light around them vanished and Cor could no longer see anything -

Cor winced as light hit his eyes. He was back on the hill, with head laid on flower bed, and cries sliced through the air and Cor did not get up, even as Ardyn and his chocobo walked _over him_ and proceeded to go on after the sound. Instead, Cor rolled onto his stomach and pressed his forehead into the grass, sighed and only after a while got up to go after his King, who, once again, was unreachable. Last time, Cor was only able to affect the very end, and this will take a while to repeat.

 

***

 

Several more of these memories happened like this. In the one on the hill, the last daemon - one from whom Ardyn apparently learned for the first time that daemons he was killing until now were in fact his subjects - actually managed to linger a bit longer, screaming curses at Ardyn, and before Cor could do anything about it, he moved into another memory. And another, and another, and Cor watched him look at people afflicted by Starscourge and understand what was about to happened and despair, not willing to kill them all, instead, coming with another way.

And now he was here, in memory that was considerably later. The last few seemed rather unimportant, but things changed with them. Ardyn was different, now with long hair, longer than Cor had ever seen on him, braided loosely with bunch of strands sticking out, though it looked rather nice. Actually very nice. So nice that Cor wished he could touch Ardyn if only to tangle his hand into that hair. Perhaps even grab a handful and pull him closer and kiss him an awful lot. And then pull on it more and make him lean his head back so Cor could kiss and mark his neck all he wanted -

He groaned and stopped that train of thought right there. This was terrible time for such thoughts. Also all he could do with them was to get frustrated, because sadly, that was not really an option here. The times when he could actually touch Ardyn, were scarce and most of them were filled with Ardyn only in the last moments remembering, realizing what is going on, and reverting to his older self just in time to see Cor, just in time to say his name and then, another memory will play.

Cor wondered what the point of this was. These memories were changing their endings, but it _didn’t stick_. The damned chocobo was still here, if anything else, he could clearly tell from that. There must be _some_ point, some reason for all of this madness.

Cor was lost in thoughts, as he followed after Ardyn, this long-haired Ardyn, just as he walked into a town. When people saw him, they almost cried. And quite soon, Cor had a hard time actually being anywhere where no one else would stand in some part of him. It bothered him a lot, even though he could not really feel it.

This time, only a few people called Ardyn prince, or anything similiar other royal titles. No. They chanted _Healer, Healer!_ with terrible joy, as he was there to save them to cure them to drive creatures - _still_ creatures, Cor noted - from their homes and hearts, and they knew nothing of the price.

Cor was quite sure they did not care for the price he had to pay in exchange. They loved their concept of _healer_ , concept of _prince of light_ , as some of them called him too. It was all too clear that was the only thing they cared about. Then again, he’d seenthe same thing with Regis. They looked at him and saw the Wall, maybe a King, but definitely not a person. Definitely not a single thought about the consequences he was facing. Similar with Lunafreya. No one cried for the girl that drowned in the Altissian waves, but for kind Oracle that was lost.

It should not make him angry, it _was to be expected_ , but it did. A lot. Especially as he saw Ardyn work his magic and get more and more exhausted and paler and outright pained with it, but they just kept coming, and then some that could not come to him called him to them and he _just went with it_.

The way he cured people  was similar to the way he enchanted his sword earlier, only this time, the magic swirled from him, took hold of the daemon in person and still as the scarlet light drawn itself back to Ardyn, though it was changing more and more to orange and yellow rather than red. It did not hurt them, though only thing it cured was the Starscourge, not any actual injuries. The only reason Cor could come up with for Ardyn to do this was that the first time he saw him destroy the daemon _and_ the Starscourge within; it was only possible while killing it, and Ardyn found another option other than outright killing so many people, _his_ people, people he was supposed to protect both as prince and as the one who the Gods chose for this task.

Cor laughed bitterly at the thought. Some task it was, truly. Ardyn must have known then that daemons in him still needed to be purged, and that it still had to be through death. As a fact, he _knew_ , he saw Ardyn sitting by a fire in the evening, looking over his hands and dark marks that were no longer vanishing even as he tried to make them with the same magic he was using until then. Instead Ardyn just made an illusion over them and went on, accepting things without complaint and oh-so-alone. He had no companion, other than his trusty chocobo, and Cor didn’t even wonder why at this point.

Eventually, it was just too much for Ardyn to handle. Visiting one of bedridden patients, an older woman, one that was really far gone, so far gone that she changed before their very eyes, and out of habit, Ardyn almost slashed her, stopping himself in last possible second and instead avoiding hers attacks as the family cried. It was then that Cor saw Ardyn stop the daemon with magic, force it to reverse back while taking the darkness that could no longer be masked by only faintly shining sparks of red and orange, onto himself, before collapsing to the floor, while family _still_ cried, went to help their now cured and Starcsourge-free member, and left their prince, their _dear Healer_ as he cried in pain in voice that did not sound all that human, on his knees, leaning forward, looking as if he was about to throw up, before calming the erratic breathing, sitting properly and looking at the family with _a smile_ and Cor wanted to just take him, flip him over his shoulder and leave. He could not, of course, but mercifully, the memory reset itself again.

Cor didn’t _want_ to see it again. He didn’t want to see him ruin himself slowly again. But he did. He stood at his side, unwavering, watched over him.

If nothing else, if he could _do nothing else_ , he would show respect for the choices he made, because they could not have been easy even for seemingly devoted believer. Ardyn liked to talk about the Gods here and there in these memories, but didn’t really seem like a zealot. Again, it reminded him of what he knew of Lunafreya.

After a while, when they entered the house of last patient, and after she turned into the daemon and Ardyn finally managed to catch her, the world shifted slightly and this time, Cor actually noticed it, the exact moment when he was once again part of the world. It was also the moment when daemon screeched as it was slowly turned into black mist and pulled to Ardyn.

He reached out to Ardyn, and their eyes met and for a moment, the light wavered as Ardyn made one step away from him, closer to the daemon, not letting go of the magic.

“Stay back. Until it’s done, you should avoid approaching me.”

Cor, of course, did not listen. “Ardyn, stop. This is not real. We’ve been here before.”

The people around them were silent, unlike last time, just like chocobo was at first, and Cor internally prepared himself for the chance of them attacking. But instead, they just…stood there. Smiling. And then smiling more, and more, until it should not have been possible for human face to look like that, but it kept going.

Ardyn seemed to notice that too, and eventually _did_ let the go of the magic, and as he did, all the darkness flew from him back to the daemon that was not fully cured yet. Also, as he did that, once again the older version of Ardyn Cor knew so well stood in the place where a younger Healer stood a second ago, looking around himself with grim expression. He did not ask this time what was going on, seemingly knowing exactly what it was.

“Cor,” he said, the name only a whisper, but Cor took his back without any other word.

“Do you know what this all means?” Cor asked in return. He hoped for a yes. Ideally an explanation.

“I might.”

Cor groaned and Ardyn laughed a little, reaching blindly back to him with one hand, while he summoned his crossbow to the other.

They didn’t get to any fighting because just like all the times before, the world shook and drowned in darkness, only this time, Cor felt Ardyn’s hand stay, and reached for it and took it into his own, turning back to actually see him still there, despite the darkness around them, which should have made it impossible.

Then the world lit up again, with stars in the sky, blinking gently from far far away above them, mirroring on the ground, oh so many of them. More than Cor had ever seen in his life and it made him smile a little as he looked around himself, and then looked back at Ardyn, just in time to see him break like the glass and shatter.

Something, something in there laughed terribly. It didn’t sound like a human at all.

 

***

 

Cor opened his eyes and he did not see bright blue sky. No, this time, it was close to evening, with touch of orange and red coloring the sky more and more. And Cor just laid there, heart in his throat still, beating frantically and hands trembling, _still_ feeling a ghost of Ardyn’s hand in his, and how it vanished with the rest of him and -

He needed to stop this, somehow, as soon as he possibly could.

 

**Author's Note:**

> This is basically fic of a fic just to make Noah and James happy.  
> For anyone wondering? How is Ardor a thing? You should definitely go check out Doe eyes and lies.


End file.
